Going forwards. And backwards.

I am putting in an application for some research funding. The forms are long and complicated and there is a fair amount of work to do in a pretty short time. I am applying in conjunction with Supervisor, who will be the named person in charge at the Institution where I do the research, and will therefore be back in the role of Supervisor. He seems to be pleased about this arrangement, and if I have to move again (and I will to get the funding) then moving to somewhere where I already know someone seems like a good idea. And we do work well together. He's a good guy. Overall, this seems like a good arrangement.

But as well as being a good way to move forward, this reseacrh funding proposal seems to have sent me backwards. To a time when schemes to avoid Supervisor in order not to have to explain why I haven't done something were planned carefully in advance. To a time when I occasionally dreaded opening emails or answering phones just in case it was Supervisor, and I hadn't finished / read /written something.

This can't be right. Surely there is a way to get over this. I am officially Dr Song now, with certificate from graduation ceremony to prove it. Fear of Supervisor must be a thing of the past. Surely.

I have to go backwards to go forwards. Or is it go forwards to go back...