Names are important. I choose to adopt a pseudonym for the blog so that what I write won't immediately be traced back to me. It gives me a freedom to say things about work and students and academia which I wouldn't necessarily want to whole academic world to read. But I chose Autumn Song because I have a fondness for autumn colours, and I think it suits me. Maybe those who know me disagree...
The names by which I am known have, until now, been a good indicator of the point in my life when the people who use them met me. My sister, who is so good at her primary school teaching job because she Sees Through the Eyes of Children has her own name for me, which others don't use. Supermum uses a mix of nicknames, full names and abreviations. Those friends I have had since I was young use one shortening of my name; those who met me at university use another. It's not a hard and fast rule, but it works most of the time. And I quite like the distinctions. It would seem odd to me if someone from one of these groups started to use the name used by the other. There are, of course, those friends and acquaintances who never use an abbreviation, either because we are not close, or because they choose not to. I don't remember He Who Once Loved Me ever shortening my name. I didn't take that as a lack of affection.
Today, one of my students sent an email to the course convenor with a request to reorganise the virtual learning environment page for the course. (And he's right, it does need tidying up.) In giving an example, he made a reference to me using a shortening of my name. I've had a few emails addressed like that too, from other students. I don't expect my students to call me Dr. or Ms. or anything particularly formal. In fact, I prefer it when they use my first name - I don't like to enforce hierarchies with students, and I find telling them to use my first name is a good way to make them feel their opinion counts for as much as mine in seminar discussions. I always address them using whichever name they use to introduce themselves in the first class (I ask them to introduce themselves by the name which they would like me to use rather than the one I've been given on the formal register) and expect them to use my name as I introduce myself to them. Shortening it implies a level of familiarity I don't feel is appropriate (there has been an exception, when a whole group chose to address me by my initials, but they asked my permission to do it, and I agreed, and I don't think this is quite the same).
What names people use is important to me - what they ask me to call them, and what they call me. Is there a way to stamp out this familiarity without seeming to assert strict hierarchies I don't want to enforce? (or upsetting those students who are over familiar without thinking about it?) Or am I doomed to be abbreviated indiscriminately for the rest of my career? Maybe I need to come up with a new name entirely for my newly qualified academic life...
Any suggestions?
2 comments:
Hmmmm....this is tricky. Having a name which is almost impossible to abbreviate, I have ended up with a series of nicknames, most of which I am quite happy to have, as they are usually a sign of endearment or friendship or whatever. But I completely agree that students should not be using overly familiar variations of your name - I don't think they should address you by any name other than that which you used when introducing yourself. For the emails they're sending you with shortened versions of your name, it could be as simply as beginning with 'please call me 'full name'' as it's polite and direct without sounding like you're giving them a row. I guess it could apply in class if someone addresses you incorrectly. Perhaps a couple of moments like that could put off other people and thus reinforce your preference for your full name?
Thanks - this is really helpful. I'd hoped signing off emails with my name in appropriate form would do it, but it clearly hasn't worked. I'll have to be more direct. I'm not good at that in face-to-face situations though. Start with email and work my way up!
Post a Comment